We often hear time is our most precious resource, it’s the only thing we can’t replace or get back. And I often get asked in workshops how we can fit person-centred practices like Motivational Interviewing into already busy appointments. It feels like there just isn’t time to add anything more.
It can be helpful to think of attention as being as valuable, if not more valuable, a resource than time. What we point our attention at is what we experience. We don’t experience what we do not pay attention to, even if it’s right there in front of us.
When we seek support, we want someone to give us their full attention. And yet as Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön observed (and I’m probably paraphrasing here), “one of the hardest places to remain truly present is in the middle of a conversation, because we are activated by everything”.
When we are supporting someone else, what are we attending to at any given moment? If we can train ourselves to stay focused on the person – their experience, where they are at, what they need – there is a very good chance we will use whatever time we have better.
Helen Mentha 