Silence can feel like an absence or a space between. Yet this one word describes a multitude of experiences the way the word ‘rain’ describes vastly different kinds of weather.
Whether silence is awkward or comfortable, welcome or combative, we can be curious what it can tell us about our relationship in that moment and what is going on for the other person.
And if we stay a little longer we may discover what else is able to emerge. Perhaps something relaxes, opens or deepens. We may be surprised, unsure or relieved. The other person may have been working through something that didn’t need our intervention or interruption.
Many of us find we need to learn to sit in silence rather than jump in. We can breathe, we can count, we can notice, we can reflect. And we can ask ourselves what flavour of silence this seems to be.
Helen Mentha 